Confessions of a Working Momma {1}

Before you read this I would just like to leave a disclaimer... I don't know what it is like to be a stay at home mom ("SAHM") and I am in NO way implying that working is harder than staying at home.  Staying at home is work too. Being a mom is tough, and no one has it 'worse' than the other...we all have our own version of "hard" and this is NOT about the comparison game.  It's about where I am right now... That said, you've been warned...read on if you so choose...

Being a working momma can be tough.  If there is one word that makes any of it easier, it's BALANCE.  I have to remind myself every day to keep things in balance.  The burning question is how do you balance the career-driven side when the baby-lovin' side just wants to take over?!  Followed by the other questions in my mind... how do you balance family life with friends and how do you balance rest with getting housework done?

Very carefully, that's how.  I have to let go of the expectation I place on myself.  

One pitfall I (all too often) fall victim to is trying to be Super-Mom!  I want to be perfect.  I want to have a successful day in the office and come home to my perfectly well behaved child, who never has spit-up on him, and prepare a gourmet decent meal for BL in a spotless moderately clean kitchen. 

Reality is that sometimes work is tough and I don't get it all done.  Reality is that sometimes my baby has gas and is really fussy.  Reality is that sometimes frozen waffles will do for dinner (as long as I add some protein for my calorie-hungry husband). 

Sometimes I feel like my house will never be clean again.  Dust bunnies in the corner, mail on the table, dishes in the sink.  They all pile up and they all drive me crazy!  There will never, ever, be enough hours in the day to complete a full day at the office and then a full day in my home. I am exhausted, I am cranky, and I am sad.  I want perfection, and yet, I realize it's just not possible.  

Spending time with my son is way more important than those dishes, and I keep it in perspective.  I have set a goal for myself to do one thing each day.  Monday I may vacuum, Tuesday I may sort the coupons strewn on the table, Wednesday I may clean the bathrooms.  Not everything has to be done in one night.  BALANCE.  

Like I said, being a momma is tough business and not for the faint of heart.  I am so blessed with my growing family and at the end of the day I just want to lay my head on my pillow and give thanks to the One who has given me way more than I will ever deserve.   He alone can sustain me to keep the balance...

In closing {for now} I want to share a little joy with you.  Little man Max loves tummy time {most days} and has awesome neck strength {isn't it amazing what moms get excited about?!}...Enjoy {the baby, not my "mom voice"}.

 

Make it a great day friends.
XO

High Five for Friday {1}

{1} One of my best girlfriends from childhood had a baby girl!  Loved meeting sweet Caroline on the day of her birth! In love with her already...

{2} Evening snuggles with my baby boy have become my favorite time of the day!

{3} Throw back Thursday was in honor of my Granddaddy, whom we lost two years ago this week.  Miss that man every single day.  

{4} Took little Max to meet his new buddy, miss Caroline!  Loved having a little baby swap time with our kiddos!  Hard to believe we played with our dolls and now we're playing with real babies...and they are ours!  HA!  Our 10 year selves would be so happy to know this is what the future holds.

{5} Someone has decided that his thumb is better than a paci. Let's see how long this lasts...

Linking up with From my Grey Desk for HF4F!

Enjoy your Friday, friends! 
XO

Obsessed with, or Depressed by, Downton

Anyone else obsessed with Downton Abbey?!  This show came to us from across the pond and has been a huge success! Something about the dramatic family/staff dynamic, set in a fascinating time period {WWI} combined with fabulous outfits and British accents.   

Love. This. Show.

They have, however, managed to make me cry harder this season that any other.  

SPOILER ALERT

Killing off two of the main characters?! {one in an incredibly real and dramatic fashion} It's just been a tough season to swallow!  Never-the-less, Downton has been saved from destruction, Bates is home with Anna and Mary has a sweet new baby boy, so I guess you can't say it was a bad season at all.  My friend Allison posted these two gems on Facebook this week and I just had to share with any fellow Downton fans...

And this is my favorite...especially if you the always-sticks-in-your-head tune by One Direction....

Since season three has just ended, I will be drowning my sorrows by watching every episode {on DVR} again, and maybe again. 

Happy Wednesday, Friends!

Month TWO!

This month....

DIAPERS:
Wearing size 1 diapers and, until this week, you had no blowouts.  You were so kind to your Papa and your Mimi and gave them both your first two blowouts in this size diaper :) 

CLOTHES: 
Wearing all 0-3 month clothing now.  Many of your pants are still too long, but your belly sure does fill up the tops!  Thankfully, you're not too squirmy when you're being changed, but I am sure that will change!

MEASUREMENTS:
Weighing in at 10lbs 10oz and 21 3/4in long, Max has certainly been eating well & growing strong!  The "official" percentiles given have only changed a bit since last month: 20% weight, 10% height and 75% head.

ACCOMPLISHMENTS:
You are holding your head up SO well! Dr. Royal told us you have "incredible tone" and you're strength is great...you can thank you Daddy for those genes!  You're also now starting to stand in our laps when we hold you up.  You're getting so strong and growing so well!

LIKES:
Cuddles with anyone (but especially mom & dad), playtime on the mat under the music and lights, KSU Choir rehearsal with your Papa, eye contact & bath time...you love bath time!! 

DISLIKES:
We found out this month that your tummy does not like milk protein that momma gives you, so for now, you don't like diary {unless it's momma's milk!}.  You also don't like being alone for very long or when you're hungry!

First Day Jitters

To say I was nervous about going back to work would be a HUGE understatement!  I was not nervous about seeing people at work, or getting back into my projects, or even fitting into my clothes (ok, maybe a little); I was nervous about leaving this adorable fella' all day long.  

We are so blessed to have family watching him all 5 days during the week, but even still, I knew I was going to miss him like crazy and feel guilty for getting back to the {work} grind.  About 3 weeks before I headed back I started to panic.    

How was I going to do this? Getting up early and leaving him somewhere else, with someone else!   

What if he forgets who I am? We have formed such a great bond, what if this breaks it?   

Is this really worth it? Can't we just go live in a tent on the beach somewhere and call it a day?!  

Each day led to new thoughts and new reasons to get upset and worry about the future.  Luckily for me, I was {and still am} surrounded by encouragement.  Family members and friends alike who prayed for me, encouraged me and talked me off the ledge.  What I am doing right now is exactly what I should be doing.  Where I am right now is exactly where I should be.  How we're choosing to look after Max is exactly how we should be....regardless of what anyone else thinks. 

So this past Sunday night, as I packed Max's bag, my lunch, my work bag and my pump {a whole other post of it's own...}, I knew what I was doing was right.  I held my sweet boy extra tight all evening, and gave him even more kisses than usual.  He reassured me that the bond we have could not be broken, not even by 8 hours spent by him at someone else's home while I worked.

When I woke up Monday morning, I knew I was covered in prayer, and I felt it.  I cried a little on our way to my sister's and then again after leaving her home, and that was it.  He was beyond happy to be with his Aunt Ash & cousins all day, and we are SO blessed to have them to watch him!

I arrived at work and was warmly welcomed by my friends...

And was provided awesome updates by Aunt Ash throughout the day...

When 4:30 rolled around, my awesome husband brought my sweet little man to me at work so I could show him around to my colleagues, and I was in heaven.  We can do this, I thought.  This is our new normal, and we can {and will} make it through! 

And at the end of the night, all we did was snuggle on the sofa.  This is a bond that can never be broken.