Tales of TTC {part two}

Significance of the Second Line

Waiting is so. Dang. Hard.  Whether it’s waiting for a simple answer, a deadline, a friend, a vacation or even the world to change {thank you John Mayer}, waiting is tough.  

If you’ve ever been like me, and waiting for the second line to appear in a HPT {Home Pregnancy Test} window, you know how tough it is to wait and you know the significance of that darn second line! You sit & wait.  You watch the clock.  You count down the seconds.  Your heart drops as the 3 minute mark passes and you think to yourself “maybe they meant 5 minutes on the instructions!” …all to say that even 20 minutes later, there is no second line.  

One nasty thing I already knew about myself, I care way too much about schedules.  Changing my plans and/or schedule will wreak havoc in my life if I let it.  I sometimes think God just laughs at my feeble attempts to control the schedule of my life, all-the-while waiting on me to give it up!!

{can anyone feel me here?!}

This morning I was reflecting on the amazing things I’ve learned from the book of James through Beth Moore’s Mercy Triumphs, and I was brought back to this passage:

Pretty powerful stuff huh?  He keeps telling us that there’s something He’s not telling us…

{Hello?! Earth to Chrissi.} 

So right there is the significance of the second line…or lack thereof…no second line means that there is something I don’t know.  {gulp} Something God is planning.  An ever present reminder that I need to align myself with His schedule, not my own.  He alone is in control. 

Tales of TTC {part one}

TTC

...anyone know what that means? 

Trying To Conceive   

{let’s see just how many acronyms I can squeeze into one post, shall we?!}

…before you read any further, let me warn you that this may be is TMI, so feel free to close this window if you are going to judge me uninterested or disgusted…

If you’ve been reading Home is Where the Heart is for longer than three months you know a little bit of the journey we’ve been on this year {if not, take a look back to catch up}; this year has been ups and downs and everything in between.  Like many women, I was told this year that it will be difficult for me to become pregnant.  Not something a woman ever wants to hear.  I have been diagnosed with PCOS, or polycystic ovary syndrome {acronym count=three}.   PCOS causes a woman’s ovaries to develop small cysts which prevent mature eggs from being released, thus preventing a woman from becoming pregnant.  The picture below shows the difference in a healthy ovary and a PCOS ovary. 

{source}

PCOS also causes weight gain, acne and hair growth…loads of lovely things.  

I have been very fortunate with the weight gain and hair growth, but the acne was one of the first symptoms I suffered from—even before the lack of period.  In fact, this summer I didn’t even want to be in a bathing suit because my back was covered in acne!  Friends and family assured me it “wasn’t that bad”, but to me it was horrendous!  The dermatologist put me on some medication to ease symptoms but they never went away completely.  It was after almost two months sans period and multiple BFN, or big fat negative on a pregnancy test {acronym count=four}, that I realized I better go see another doctor.  A few blood tests, one sonogram and a trip to an endocrinologist later, I was diagnosed with PCOS and put on metformin to treat the symptoms.  Metformin decreases the symptoms by increasing the body's sensitivity to insulin and will sometimes cause the menstrual cycles to normalize.  Its one of the few main treatments for PCOS and the only one to use if you're TTC.  The others include birth control pills and another testosterone blocker, neither of which could obviously be used while TTC.
 

So where does this leave us? 

Needless to say, it currently leaves us without a baby…but also leaves us very hopeful because we have a diagnosis and a treatment plan.   I have been on Metformin for almost four months now and will continue to be on this medicine until we get a BFP, or Big Fat POSITIVE {fifth acronym…is this a record?!}!!! 

Do you know anyone who suffers from PCOS?  It can be a very confusing diagnosis because some people are a little fuzzy on the details…some people think you have to be obese or you have to have had irregular periods your entire adult life.  Truth is, PCOS, like many illnesses, comes in a variety of shapes and sizes, so to speak. Share your thoughts, ask questions...the best way to get answers is to ask the questions.  The main reason I even posted this is so others with PCOS may find it and know they are not alone!


...stay tuned for more...this is a marathon not a sprint!